Welcome to the Bellowing Wilds, the world’s deadliest jungle where everything wants to kill you! Good thing you’re here, so we can warn you of the worst ways to go out while exploring. Read on to find out what to avoid!

5. Munched by a mech

The foreclaimers built a bunch of robotic creatures to help them out. They used to be super useful and friendly, until Xanu’s Decimation happened and they turned against their creators with the order to “Kill them all.” Not great. There’s several varieties out there and they’re not good at distinguishing friend from foe. You’re an enemy to them, a very brittle enemy. The best thing to do when you see one is to leave.

4. Ambushed by amalgahounds

Talk about a triple threat! If one monster isn’t bad enough, try three-in-one. The amalgahound is a horrifying combination of a thistlewolf, a tar maw, and even the dire tarrasque (which is so dangerous it gets its own entry here). It can scare you witless, shoot flammable tar at you, and body check you so hard you break bones. You really don’t want to come across this thing.

3. Perished in a pool

You might think that, after all this perilous adventuring, taking a dip in a hot spring is the perfect way to relax? WRONG. Acidic pools look just like safe pools, except a single second inside one of these death traps can melt your flesh clean off your bones. Avoid at all costs! 

2. Doomed by a duck

“Oh, hi there, little buddy! You’re so cute! Let me just—AAAAAAAGGGGGHHH, NOOOOOOO!” These are the last words of the most recent person to die to the doom duck. Don’t let its cuteness fool you, this duck is actually a demon in disguise. Those downy feathers? Razor-sharp. That cute quack? An earthquake trigger. Those adorable eyes? Lasers. You see this monster, you run for your QUACKing life.

1. Trampled by the tarrasque

Okay, so, you know the normal tarrasque? Big red guy, chompy teeth, spiny carapace, and, like, 650 hit points? What if we told you there’s a dire version out there with 700+ hit points and it’s ready to eat you? It can go on a rampage; bite, claw, gore, and tail-whack you for 170 average damage a round; and deal triple damage to any building you’re cowering in. Even the air itself is scared of the dire tarrasque, meaning that you can’t fly within 200 feet of it. If you encounter one of these, sorry, bud: you’re screwed.

Fool’s Gold Finale Sale!

In celebration of the Fool’s Gold web series finale on March 4, 2026, Hit Point Press is running a sale on Fool’s Gold products! Find even more ways to die in the jungle, and how to torment your players with these threats! Get Fool’s Gold: Into the Bellowing Wilds now, out in hardback, PDF, and box set!